Resources

Book Resources

Books available through Rainbows Canada

Feelings - Rainbows Storybook
Everyone has feelings. The importance of sharing feelings and understanding them is the focus of this simple, easy-to-read book. $6.00

We're Doing It - Rainbows Storybook
Divorce is a grown-up problem that brings about a lot of changes. This book can help children realize that sometimes we can learn from others going through the same experience. $6.00

Being A Family - Rainbows Storybook
Family means sharing life together no matter how many people are part of it or how it came about. $6.00

About Death - Rainbows Storybook
A sensitive portrayal of death as a part of life. $6.00

It Takes Time - Rainbows Storybook
It can take some time for a bond to develop in stepfamilies which include new members and different circumstances. Everyone working together can make it happen. $6.00

Kristopher Finds A Rainbow
Kristopher is very sad... for his Mommy and Daddy were getting a divorce. (Kristopher wondered what that meant.) When Kristopher's teacher is disappointed because Kristopher is not doing his home work, yelling at another student for no reason and for pushing a little girl down, Kristopher is sent to the Principal's office. After Ms. Kanga, the principal discovers that Kristopher is worried about his parents divorce, she says she knows what Kristopher needs...Rainbows. This book addresses how children may feel and how they can be helped through Rainbows. $6.00

The Compassionate Companion
If you are a single-parent or stepparent looking for information, guidance and a chance to create a strong, loving new family unit, Rainbows can provide what you need with this comprehensive, 58 page guide that covers loss issues due to death or divorce of a parent - The Compassionate Companion.

"At times, being a single-parent can be overwhelming and lonely. We can feel as ineffective as one hand clapping. Yet, with practice, perseverance and patience, the music you create will be the single symphony of your family."

This resource is ideal for agencies and organizations who assist grieving single parents and their families. Useful as a personal individual guide, it has also been utilized as a discussion tool in group settings. $3.00

To order the above books, please Email your request including your full name and address to brenda@rainbows.ca. Shipping/Handling and Taxes will be added to the above prices. A sales order will be sent to you for prepayment of your order.

Free Books available through the Government of Canada

What happens next? Information For Kids About Separation and Divorce. An excellent resource prepared by the Department of Justice. This book is meant to help children between nine and twelve years old learn some basic facts about family law and the processes that families go through when they split up. It also helps children realize that it is normal to have many emotions and concerns throughout the transition. Available online at www.justice.gc.ca, by email at cca-dgve@justice.gc.ca or by phone at 1-888-373-2222. Catalogue No. J2-215/2007E.

Because Life Goes On - Helping Children and Youth Live with Separation and Divorce. Published through Health and Welfare. This wonderful publication helps parents communicate with their children, answer difficult questions and respond to their needs. It is published in both in English and French. Fax order to: 613-941-5366 or mail to: Health Canada, Communications and Publications, Ottawa, Ontario K1A 0K9

Other books available at a bookstore or local library

Badger's Parting Gifts, Susan Varely Badger's Parting Gifts is a nicely illustrated and easy to read book which talks about the feelings associated with the death of a loved one. The story's setting takes place in the forest, and the participants are the forest animals. Badger knew that he would die soon because he felt old and that his body did not work as well, but he was not afraid of dying. He felt his time had come to go. However he was worried about his friends feeling sad, so he talked to them and tried to prepare them. That winter Badger died and the forest animals felt very sad. They all got together and started talking about their nice memories, how Badger had done special things with them, how he had taught them different things, and most of all, how they all felt a special and unique attachment to Badger. When Spring finally arrived, the animals were not as sad anymore and whenever they thought of Badger, a story would be remembered and they would all smile. Although Badger was not with them anymore, he had left them all special gifts of love that could be treasured for always.

Help! A Girl's Guide to Divorce and Stepfamilies, Nancy Holyoke The changes that come with divorce can be difficult for a girl. In this third book in the Help! Series, we answer girls' letter about every aspect of divorce, from the initial split-up to a parent's remarriage. The book includes quizzes and tips, plus advice from girls who've been there and have wisdom to share. 1-56247-749-8

My Parents Are Getting Divorced, Florence Cadier with Melissa Daly. Your parents have decided to separate. Suddenly the two people you thought you could always count on seem not so dependable anymore. You have a lot of questions: why are thy doing this? Will I have to choose between them? Do they still love me? IS this my fault? Inside you will find hones, clear answers to your questions and suggestions for how to cope with a tough situation, from talking with your parents, to dealing with a new living situation, to deciding what to call a stepparent.
0-8109-9163-2

Michael Arvaarluk Kusugak Northern Lights: The Soccer Trails relates the story of Kataujaq, a young Inuit girl, whose mother dies of a sudden illness. Kataujaq feels very sad because she misses her mother, so one day her grandmother tells her that "People die, and when they die, their souls leave their bodies and go up into the heavens, and there they live..." and on clear moonlit nights when the Northern Lights can be seen, it is not the stars that are up there but the soul of the dead playing soccer, chasing each other all over the sky. Soccer is a very popular game among the Inuit, and they like to play at night when the moon and the stars are out. This book talks about the consolation that some beliefs might bring. I would recommend this book for children, especially since it carries a message of comfort.

On the Day His Daddy Left, E. Adams. Like many children, Danny is afraid his parents' divorce is his fault. So on the day his daddy leaves, Danny writes a secret question on a slip of paper: Is it my fault? He shows the question to his teacher, his friend, and his dad and mom. Everyone reassures him that the divorce is not his fault. With tears in her eyes, his mom writes NO on the back of the paper so when Danny needs to, he can be comforted again and again. In this simple, poignant story, Eric J. Adams and Kathleen Adams focus on the misplaced guilt commonly felt by children of divorcing parents. Layne Johnson's realistic paintings dramatically convey Danny's strong emotions. Ages 5-9. 0807560731

Saying Good-bye to Grandma, Jane Resh Thomas. The day that Grandma died, the family drove all afternoon and half the night going back to the place where Mom and Dad grew up. Susie sat in the back and wondered what happens at a funeral. 'Although few adults will succeed in finishing the book with dry eyes, children old enough to wonder about what goes on at a funeral will be fascinated with the details of an occasion about which they often hear but in which they are seldom included. One finishes the book with a feeling of joy for life, especially as it is celebrated by children.' 0-395-54779-2

The Fall of Freddy the Leaf - A Story of Life for All Ages, Leo Buscaglia. This book deals with the issue of death in a very natural manner. Freddy the Leaf begins his life as a tiny sprout on a tree branch. Freddy is a curious little leaf who wants to know all about life. There is another leaf named Daniel, who has been around longer; he is wiser and more experienced; he tells Freddy all about life on the tree. As the weather gets warmer, and the spring turns into summer, Freddy enjoys all the activities in the park where his tree is rooted. He especially likes the older people sitting under the tree to enjoy its shade in those hot summer days, and also the laughter of children as they play and run around. Freddy the Leaf really enjoys life as a fullgrown leaf, and when summer turns into fall and all the leaves on all the trees in the park begin to change colour and become bright reds or yellows or purples or many other beautiful colours, he is surprised by the transformation and asks Daniel what is happening. Daniel explains about fall and about moving on or dying, and changing into something else in the cycle of life. Freddy is afraid of dying, but Daniel explains to him that just as spring turned into summer and he was happy with that change, the time to move from living to dying is another stage that we all must go through, and that the purpose of life has been to enjoy the sun and the moon, the change of colours, the children's laughter and many other delightful experiences. Also, that even though we all move on, life will continue, with new and wonderful experiences for those who will follow.

The Memory String, Chester G. Osborne. Each button on Laura's memory string represents a piece of her family's history. The buttons Laura cherishes the most are the ones that belonged to her mother - a button from her prom dress, the pretty white one off her wedding dress, and, most precious of all, a single button from the nightgown she was wearing the day she died.
When the string breaks, Laura's new stepmother is there to console her and search for a missing button, just as Mom would have done. But it's not the same - Jane isn't Mom.
Laura can't hold that against Jane forever, though. And isn't a memory string for recofrding new memories too? 068931020X


The Saddest Time, Norma Simon. This book contains three stories regarding children who lose family members or friends during different stages of life. The first part is the story of a boy named Michael. Michael loved his Uncle Joe very much, unfortunately, Uncle Joe became sick and died. After his uncle died, Michael was very sad but remembered fondly the nice times they had together, mainly the kites his Uncle Joe used to make at his shop, and how happy Uncle Joe used to get when they were at the park flying them up so high. Although his uncle died, Michael knew that he would always remember him, especially when he saw high-flying kites. The second story is about some school children losing one of their friends to an accident. This is the story of Teddy Baker, an eight year old who was hit by a car and died on his way to the hospital. All of his friends at school were very sad but talked about him a lot. They decided to write a letter to his parents to express their thoughts. Feelings of anger, guilt and sadness were shared and that helped them feel a little better. The last story deals with the death of Emily's grandmother. Although her grandmother had lived a good life, Emily was still sad and angry, she cried a lot and missed her very much. After the funeral, the family got together and talked about grandma. Emily remembered very warmly how she and grandma used to bake.

The Un-Wedding
Babette Cole From the creator of "Our, Dog" and Drop Dead" comes a lighthearted yet helpful introduction to the difficult topic of divorce. Join siblings Demetrius and Paula as they orchestrate the perfect solution for their bickering parents, proving that divorce can be a good thing for everyone concerned. Full-color illustrations. 0679888985

The Very Best of Friends, Margaret Wild and Julie Vivas. The Very Best of Friends is an interesting story which narrates the very special relationship that a cat named William had with James, his owner. The experiences they both shared, are colourfully told, and the special bond that existed between them, is nicely conveyed. Jessie, James' wife, was not very fond of cats, but somehow tried to love William. One day James died unexpectedly, and William's world became very confusing. While Jessie was busy with her own grief, she failed to understand William's needs and perplexity of what was occurring. The expressions of rage and loneliness, that William was experiencing, are well illustrated in the story. A parallel could be drawn to what anybody could experience when faced with the death of a loved one. Everyone's grief is different, and sometimes those who are grieving are so consumed in their own pain that they are not able to see that there are others who are also grieving, who might need their attention.
In this story, Jessie was able to see that William also needed to be cared for and that he was also sad. Once she realized this, the relationship between her and William the cat grew warmer, and together they were able to do the things that they had enjoyed doing with James in the past.

The Very Best of Friends, Margaret Wild and Julie Vivas. The Very Best of Friends is an interesting story which narrates the very special relationship that a cat named William had with James, his owner. The experiences they both shared, are colourfully told, and the special bond that existed between them, is nicely conveyed. Jessie, James' wife, was not very fond of cats, but somehow tried to love William. One day James died unexpectedly, and William's world became very confusing. While Jessie was busy with her own grief, she failed to understand William's needs and perplexity of what was occurring. The expressions of rage and loneliness, that William was experiencing, are well illustrated in the story. A parallel could be drawn to what anybody could experience when faced with the death of a loved one. Everyone's grief is different, and sometimes those who are grieving are so consumed in their own pain that they are not able to see that there are others who are also grieving, who might need their attention.
In this story, Jessie was able to see that William also needed to be cared for and that he was also sad. Once she realized this, the relationship between her and William the cat grew warmer, and together they were able to do the things that they had enjoyed doing with James in the past.

Thumpy's Story A Story of Love and Grief shared by Thumpy, the Bunny. As told to Nancy C. Lodge Thumpy's story is a heartwarming, sensitive look at the death of a loved one: a little sister, as seen through the eyes of a child -- in this story, through the eyes of Thumpy the Bunny.
The story describes death's effects upon little children: it allows them to explore their feelings in a manner that is very real and very caring. Feelings of loss, anger, guilt and sadness become quite real in the bereaved child; these feelings can affect family interaction. Beautifully illustrated and well narrated, Thumpy's Story carries a comforting message for both children and adults.

Two Homes, Clair Masurel. 'Parents looking for a book about separation or divorce will find few offerings as positive, matter-of fact, or child-centered as this one...Simple, yet profoundly satisfying.' Ages 3 - 6 0-7636-1984-1

Waiting for the Whales, Sheryl McFarlane. Illustrated by Ron Lightburn Waiting for the Whales is a very nicely illustrated children's book which touches on the relationship between young and old and their interaction with nature. This is the heartwarming story of a lonely old man, who finds joy in working in his garden, going for walks in the woods, collecting watercress for his soups and fallen logs for fire wood, and most of all, waiting for the orcas to come back every summer. At the end of summer, when the orcas went away he would become very sad.
Then one spring day, the old man's daughter came back unexpectedly, holding a little baby girl in her arms. He said something about noisy babies, but as soon as he held the baby he felt something warm inside of him. He took his granddaughter to see the orcas that summer, when they arrived, and then to all of his favourite places. As the little girl grew older she followed her grandpa everywhere, and helped him with all the routine of planting, tilling and watering, and then to wait for the orcas to return. One day the old man began to feel tired and did not want to do anything anymore, so the girl and her mother took care of everything, the old man would just sit and watch, and wait. The day the orcas came back that summer the old man died. His granddaughter was very sad, but her mother told her that his spirit had gone to swim with the whales. The next summer something extraordinary happened. There was something different about the orcas, some of them seemed to be hanging back, and then the little girl noticed, there was a new calf swimming with them! She cried with joy and ran to tell her mother.

When Dinosaurs Die: A Guide to Understanding Death, Laurie Krasny Brown and Marc Brown. This colourful, well illustrated book attempts, as the title suggests, to explain death in terms that children can understand. It is a guide which is simple to read and understand. Illustrated with colourful cartoon dinosaurs, the book can appeal to children and also ease the discomfort the topic of death and grief can bring. When Dinosaurs Die talks about death as it affects everybody, from the very young to the very old. The different rituals and traditions which help people to deal with their grief are mentioned, as well as different causes and types of deaths and about feelings regarding the death of a loved one. Topics such as what death means, how to say good bye, fears, and some suggestions on how to remember a loved one who has died are included in this guide, as well as a glossary of words that children may not understand regarding the death of someone. This book can answer some of the questions children may have regarding death in a manner that is straightforward yet warm and caring. It is an excellent resource for caregivers, as well as those who work with children.

When My Parents Forgot How to Be Friends, Jennifer Moore-Mallinos. My parents used to be friends and I was happy. We did everything together. Then thins started changing. My parents were always sad, and when they talked it was only to argue. I used to think it was my fault that my parents weren't friends any longer...but now I understand that they can get along better if they each live in a different house. Whatever happens, my Mom and Dad will never stop being my parents...and best of all...they will always love me. 0-7641-3172-9